Tomatoes – Gourmet Peasant, we have an important question to ask you.
Gourmet Peasant – Are you talking to me?
Tomatoes – Ah, yeah. Who else would we be talking to?
GP – Okay, alright, ask your question.
T – If you love tomatoes as much as you say you do, how do you explain your abusive behavior towards them?
GP – Um, what do you mean by abusive behavior?
T - Example, just the other day, upstate at your mother’s the two of you singled out five healthy looking Heirloom tomatoes, separated them from the bunch, and covered them with a paper bag so they could not see where you were taking them. Once you had them back at the house, you fired the grill, lined the tomatoes up, and grilled them. See how terrified they are waiting to be fired...
Now as if that weren’t bad enough, once they were grilled, you had to pile them one on top of the other like rotting corpses...
Then, to add insult to injury, you poured adobe chilies and lime juice all over their blistering bodies before finally putting them out of misery in that torture chamber of a device you call a Cuisinart.
GP - Ah, um, well, we were making Salsa de Tomate Asado...
T -You mother sure did enjoy eating their remains on her vegetarian tacos.
And here you are taking pictures!! Have you any compassion? What do you have to say for yourself?
GP - What else can I say, the tacos were great.